in an effort to reach out to other moms experiencing a trisomy13 pregnancy, i will share thoughts i've had- thoughts i am not proud of but i have a feeling may be normal. i had felt some shame in having these thoughts- i don't entertain them very long because i feel they come from a dark place- but the shame comes more from pride than from anywhere else.
these thoughts you may have- then again, i am a shallow vain person- so you may not have these thoughts at all.
one of the first thoughts i had- probably a day or so after the initial diagnosis- was one of relief. i felt i didn't have to care about what i ate, drank, did. that i didn't have to take prenatal vitamins anymore. i immediately felt sick about having this thought, and told myself, "if i have ANY hope of meeting this little one, i will be even more vigilant about my diet and care for myself.
another thought i've had is more of a vain thought. in every pregnancy i have an occassional worry about getting back into prepregnancy shape, or something similar.
i always can rely on breastfeeding and babywearing(things that i naturally gravitate towards anyway) to burn calories and shed pounds. this time around i have a little more occassional worry about getting back to prepregnancy shape without a newborn to help me. and will i want to take care of myself physically during an emotional time such as what i am facing?
if i have any other similar thoughts i will share. again, i am not proud of these, i just feel if i share them, you may feel more normal, or at least better about any thoughts you may be having.